A Promise Is A Promise
[Allashua Painting by Vladyana Krykorka, "A Promise is a Promise" - Robert Munsch and Michael Kusugak]
Of all the bedtime stories I’ve read to my kids, one of their favourites has to be Robert Munsch’s “A Promise Is A Promise”, the tale of a Innuit girl named Allashua who learns about the importance of keeping a promise. My girls love this book not only for the story told therein, but also because of how it has carried forth into their own lives.
You see, after I read this story to my kids, whenever I would tell them “I promise”, I’d follow that promise by saying “and remember, a promise is a promise”. I did this because I wanted them to appreciate that this particular word carried a special meaning, that it was something significant. I wanted them to understand that saying “I promise” meant that no matter how tired I was, or how busy I was, or whoever asked me for my help with something, I would honour my word to them that we would do what I had promised before anything else. I also made sure they noted how those times where I wasn’t sure I could promise something that I’d only say “We’ll see” so they could truly appreciate that when I promised them something, it was as good as done. Now I only have to say “I promise” and if it’s something they really want, they’ll reply “and Papa, a promise is a promise”, reminding me that I had given them my word.
Of course, keeping your word is something that is very important to all kids; I’m sure we all have memories from our childhood about promises being sealed with the pledge to ‘cross your heart and hope to die’. The currency of keeping promises in our youth were prized and cherished, as the cost of breaking them was very high, measured often by the loss of friendships.
And yet, it seems that as we grow older, this currency loses value in our eyes, where saying that we promise to do something is no longer binding or important. We make promises to get together, to help out a friend, but then we have no qualms about forsaking these commitments, offering up such excuses as our being so busy, so distracted by all the stuff we got on our plate. Our apologetic stance in which we offer it, though, is not so much to admit fault at our not keeping our word as it is trying to seek sympathy from those we’ve let down; that they empathize with how hard it is for us to keep such promises. However, the sad part here is that what we’re also telling this person is that they’re not that important to us, that we don’t mind forsaking our commitments to them, if not caring that they might see us as a person whose word cannot be counted on.
I’ve taught my kids that life can be hard, that there are things we can lose through no fault of our own – like losing a job in poor economic times, or your house because of a fire or severe weather storm. They appreciate that we can protect ourselves as best as we can but still be vulnerable to facing such losses. And yet, they also understand that the one thing no one can take away from you is the value of your word, especially if you always remember the significance behind saying the words “I promise”.
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