In my previous piece “Validation – The First Step Starts With Us“, I spoke of how giving praise or showing appreciation to others serves to validate what people intuitively know about themselves, that it creates the understanding that they are being recognized for what they do or how they feel.  While the piece gave rise to some wonderful comments and discussions here on this blog and elsewhere, it also brought to light some interesting experiences relating to the act of acknowledging those around us.  After reading my piece on validation, some of my readers shared with me their stories of showing appreciation to others and how the reactions they received from the act were mostly that of indifference and in some cases even wariness or suspicion.

These experiences understandably left them doubting their ability to offer validation to those around them, if not the value of their words and actions.  It also left a few of them asking the question of how can one help validate others if they don’t value what you’re trying to offer.  To answer this question, I want to first look at two reasons why the act of offering praise or appreciation is not having any beneficial effect on those receiving it. Click here to continue reading »”Believing In The Power Of You”

One of the things I enjoy about the internet is that it has become a wonderful outlet for creative expression; that it provides us with the opportunity to enjoy the works of talented individuals we might not otherwise know of. A good example of this is the award-winning film short “Validation”. The story focuses on a man whose job is to validate parking stubs, but who we learn very early on in the film also offers the shopping mall patrons a sense of validation for who they are. The film is not only inspiring thanks to its feel-good nature, but it’s also very effective in reminding us of how powerful the simple act of showing an appreciation and understanding of others can impact those around us.

Of course, how much validation a person can feel upon hearing words of appreciation or praise is very much dependent on the person’s own sense of self-worth, something the writers of this film are acutely aware of. In this film, the reason why the lead character has such an impact on those around him is not just because he’s telling them something no one’s ever told them; rather, it’s because he’s telling them Click here to continue reading »”Validation – The First Step Starts With Us”